Situation Report

Situation Report
29th August 2001

It’s been a long, tiring month.

Having somewhat recovered from the virus that had laid me low after my incredible work stretch, I returned to college to work on the Convocation. My fever promptly returned, and I spent the last two days working with a hundred-degree fever. However, the Convocation went off fairly well – the yearbook was well appreciated, as were the rest of the ceremonies. The launch of the media newsletter Blab!, which I designed, titled and contributed to, went off as planned at the hands of Cyrus Oshidar. Although the newsletters were left behind in college and nearly forgotten. Until Auntie and myself rescued the day. Superman and Supergirl to the rescue.

I returned late on the night of 12th August, miserably ill. Too ill, in fact, to attend Oshidar’s workshop the next morning. I did something intelligent and visited a doctor, and spent the next four days convalescing.

And then Dad and Amma landed up in Pune on the 18th. Dad needed a break from work; Amma was tagging along. It was definitely nice to see them, but there was something very strange about having other people in the house all the time. I’ve no problems readjusting when I return home, but I’ve gotten too used to the loneliness of my home in Pune.

Anyways, I needed a long break. Something that was promised to us by our Director, but never delivered. So I took off for home with my family for Ganesh Chaturthi. That was the second-best break I’ve had since coming to Pune – the best being the first time I returned home. I’ve slept like a log, watched TV and generally farted around with no pressures to worry about.

The best part was that I got to meet my best friend and my sweetheart. Not to mention Hairy Puttar and DJ. DJ and I spent over six hours at Andheri at my best friend’s house. My sweetheart also joined us, and it was a lovely evening.

I’ve been worried about my best friend. She hasn’t gotten admission as yet into an M.Sc. or Pathology course. Her last recourse is an MBA, and it’s slowly turning into her main option. The only problem is her conservative family. They want to get her married.

She’s been sounding like she’s already lost hope. Her emails read, "I’m getting married in 6 months. You are invited." I’ve been trying to boost her spirits, reminding her that it’s her life and that she’ll never be happy unless she does what she truly wants to. Things are slightly better now – she’s more relaxed and hopeful. That’s the way it should be. I just can’t bear to see her unhappy.

My sweetheart still holds that status in my life. We only had a few minutes alone that day, but we were as we’ve always been. Cuddled up, holding hands on the sofa, talking. And now she’s thrown me into confusion. I’ve just received an email from her, where she signs off saying, "Love you."

I’ve had very strong feelings for her for a while now, feelings that only my best friend knows about. Even when I was going around with Smelly my heart was divided. Last evening I went for a movie with my college pals. However, I haven’t been able to stop thinking about my sweetheart since last afternoon. I guess I still have some soul-searching to do. Not for the first time I wish I could read women’s minds, a la Mel Gibson in What Women Want. I really wish I knew how she feels about me.

It’s surprising, but I’d been thinking of Smelly quite a lot before I left for Bombay. I guess it happens whenever I’m planning to return home. Bombay holds some fond memories for me about us – Pune has soured those memories now. I’ve now struck out twice with girls I’ve taken to that little lane near the NCPA – first with Jum and now with Smelly. I guess I’ll need to find another khopcha for my next affair. I’d better start exploring Kandivili well – who knows what’ll happen between my sweetheart and me.

And what about Legs? We spoke for nearly two hours the night after I returned. She was a little low and I caught it immediately, stunning her. I keep telling her that I know her better than she thinks, but her memory is like a sieve. She never remembers.

We’ve become closer since our little three-month rift. We’ve also become closer since my encounter with Smelly. She’s opened up a lot about her love life, and we’ve had some amazing conversations since then. I always tell her that we should get together as a couple – for the first time she agreed that night. On the condition that I give her a solitaire for our engagement. So I’ve started saving up.

Groper and I are having an affair – that’s what we tell everybody in class. This is what you call keedas. She spent the night at my place a few days ago – working on an assignment, nothing else, you pervert. And she threw up with food poisoning two days ago. So we’ve started spreading the rumour that she’s pregnant – but not with my child. I’m gonna become a chacha. Extra keedas, no?

We’re going for another movie this afternoon. Free passes to film festival, must take full advantage. So I’m going to sign off now, but I’ll be back. Like the Terminator. Or a bad penny.

End of situation report. Over and out.