Henpecked

So barely had I recovered from jaundice and returned to work (for a whole ten days!!!) than I was struck down again.

This time, it's chickenpox.

I know what you're thinking. Isn't that a kiddy disease? Well, yes, it is. But I didn't have chickenpox (or jaundice, malaria, measles or mumps) as a child, and now I'm making up for it.

It was last Saturday that I noticed myself covered in boils. They'd taken over me, from face to torso. There were even boils on my head! (Which I first attributed to Parachute After-Shower Hair Gel and swore to throw away, a resolution I can gladly give up, Parachute After-Shower Hair Gel rocks, thank you.)

And the worrying part was that only Mom has had it – neither Dad nor Sis were ever afflicted by chickenpox.

The cure – antibiotics to prevent the skin from remaining scarred (I'm getting married you see, and I have no time for Fair & Lovely's 3-month guarantee), anti-histamines and a soothing lotion.

Believe me, it's worse than jaundice. Why? Because of the isolation.

I now live alone in my room. Sis has moved into the folks' bedroom. So I spend most of the day alone, reading and re-reading books, faffing on my laptop and watching the rubbish they're serving up on TV these days.

Yeah, the folks have decided that if they had to have got the virus, then they've gotten it already. So they're not exactly keeping their distance – but neither are they getting too close.

And, of course, I've had to tell Slappy (and all my friends) to stay away.

So I've met Slappy precisely thrice over the last two weeks, with one more week of isolation to go.

Argh.

There are some interesting learnings from this experience, though.

Did you know that you can easily keep yourself entertained between 11 PM and 1.30 AM every night? At 11, tune in to Jay Leno on the Tonight Show on Zee Café. Move on to Friends on Star World at midnight. After that, Friends moves on to Zee Café. And then switch back to Star World for The Simpsons at 1 AM.

Fun, no?

The other learning is that daytime television has started sucking really badly. Even the movies.

The other thing that's caught my interest is the progression of the disease. The initial eruptions ripened into nice, fat boils – some of them filled with pus even. Then they started drying up and scabbing, and now, one by one, the scabs are beginning to fall off. Every time a scab comes off, I almost applaud.

(It's really getting frustrating in here.)

It has come to my notice that I can deliberately infect people with chickenpox by scabbing or bursting boils around them. So, for the heck of it, I drew up a (short) list of people I'd like to infect.

The owner of Befit Zone – yeah, you looking for it on the search engine, Befit Zone – for robbing Slappy and me out of our memberships. He refused to acknowledge that we'd gotten jaundice and weren't allowed to work out, and allowed our memberships to expire. On top of that, he was very rude to both of us, and even threatened me on the phone after I'd hung up on him.

A couple of clients come to mind, for frustrating me by shelving projects and work constantly.

Hmm. Obviously I didn't think too much on this, I've run out of targets.

So, anyway, I'm stuck in bed for another week. And I'm feeling rather sorry for myself. I've just spent a month in bed, and now I'm back there. Argh!

Don't laugh, or I'll burst a boil on you and then you'll be sorry.